Reflections
Leaving home for a while helps travellers to find peace and harmony. Usually it's harmony that lives up to our expectations. Whatever minor nuisances and irritations there are in normal family living often disappear amid new surroundings.
In our still-new marriage, Howard and I rarely find reason to disagree, unless disagreements stem from our vastly different needs to organize our world. Mostly, we "discuss" our differences, like will we ever cruise to Australia on a tugboat? My answer is "Are you kidding? I'd go bonkers on such a long ocean voyage." Recently, he answered sadly, "Well, maybe I'll have to go alone." I found these words unsettling and almost a reason for an argument. But I could hear a definite reluctance in his voice. So off we went to Baltimore, a lot closer than Australia, with an Elderhostel all about Robert Schumann.
From now on, Baltimore will resonate with Schumann's beautiful piano music and his symphonies. The Peabody Institute of Music offers programs year-round with changing musical topics. It amazed me to see how knowledgeable our fellow students were.
We did get an opportunity to tour Baltimore, an up-and-coming city with much for the tourist to appreciate. We met old, dear friends and some pleasant new ones.
Peabody made our vacation experience a true pleasure: interesting classes, fine instructors and a good group of people from all over the country. Coming home created unnerving events like staying up till midnight to sort and read the mail. Despite some jet lag, we managed to survive our El Niño weather after Baltimore's near 90-degree temperature.
Then came the inevitable. I persuaded Howard to go to a movie, since it had been almost a month without one. If you have seen "Truman," you may guess why disharmony entered our lives. Picture a romantic writer, English teacher and a logical, bridge-loving engineer viewing this film that takes viewers into a wild ride into a mind-blowing fantasy with an improbable premise. Early on, I could tell by the shifting around and the muttering that Howard did not accept this premise easily.
I ignored his not-so-private comments and focused on putting on a cogent defense that I knew I would need when we left the protective darkness of the theater. "That was the worst picture I have ever seen. It was stupid and totally unbelievable."
Into the breach I went. "Oh no, it was fascinating and artistic with wonderful ideas to think about. Ed Harris was like a God with modern technology to keep his philosophy working."
"The idea of a huge set with a fake ocean, moon and sun was so ridiculous and impossible that I should ask for my money back."
"The critics raved and said Jim Carrey's acting was amazing and powerful."
By the time we drove into the garage and entered the house, Howard made his expected move to return to harmony. He kissed me. We haven't talked about the movie since.
Now I am getting nervous about our planned vacation at Tahoe. We are meeting his sister and brother-in-law there.
Howard looks forward to being all together since that rarely happens. I am already practicing my mantra which helps me keep my cool. By coincidence, Howard recently took out Dr. Benson's book on meditation from the library. I suspect that it will take the full five hours of our ride home to resurrect our usual state of loving peace and harmony, if you get what I mean.
Charlotte Kaye Jarmyis a Los Altos resident and longtime contributorto the Town Crier.